Well, before going too deep in explanations, here’s a short, sweet & accurate video about it:
You noticed, I think, the moment when the client tried to get up that ladder, where the distance between the steps was too big. And then (s)he noticed it was too difficult, the effort they had to make was too big and so they made the steps smaller by adding extra-steps.
That happens so often to so many of us. Me included :). We evaluate the situation poorly (us, humans, are generally not very good at assessing situations correctly) and we assume we will reach our goal quickly, in a few big steps. This is a way of putting too much pressure on us.
But the problem is that many of us don’t change anything, even if we become aware that we are putting too much pressure on ourselves. If nothing changes, in the end this can lead to burnout. And, as a result, we will probably quit working towards our precious goal – at least for a while, if not forever.
If however, we stop and make the change, adapt the plan and add extra-steps in reaching our goal, that will help us a lot. And if we know that we are tempted to put pressure on us as a rule, then a good thing to do is try self-compassion. This will help us be kinder to ourselves when we make mistakes and teach us not to make that mistake again. Only when we are really well within, can we work, socialize and take care of others.
Now, getting back to the phases of a coaching process, it depends on the type of coaching. Some don’t imply a whole process and can offer an answer to a question in 1 session.
But transformational or positive psychology coaching, they do involve a process. Because they imply a change at a deeper level. A change in habits and beliefs. A change which will result in a person that is happier with themselves and their life. A person focused on living in the present moment, that enjoys whatever they do, even when it is something difficult. A person in control of their life.
What is the point in giving coaching a try? Doesn’t life change us anyway?! It sure does! But then if we look a bit into ourselves and at our life and ask ourselves: how do we feel most of the time: satisfied or dissatisfied or somewhere in between? And are we happy about that? Are we grateful for what we have in our life? Are we happy with the relationships we have with our family and/or friends? Do we wake up in the morning feeling excited about the day ahead? And if the answer to these questions is rather “NO”, then we will probably need to change something, I guess.
I mean, sure, we are aware that we need to improve as a person and we might even know what we have to improve. But how far do we go from there? Do we actually take steps in that direction? Or do we just go on with our lives same as before? I for one admit that before I got to know about positive psychology and mindfulness, I had an idea what I needed to improve about myself and I was thinking to go to a psychologist for that, at some point. To help me with some healthy boundaries, for example. And then the pandemic happened, a traumatic event came with it and changed me so much that I desperately needed mindfulness meditation for 8 weeks, daily. But this should not be the case. We should want (NOT “need”) to make that change and also be aware that such changes take time (small steps).
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As soon as you have established that you do want to feel more in control of your life, have better relationships, feel more calm and accomplished in general, then you might want to consider positive psychology coaching (PPC). In PPC, the coach enables you to grow and flourish, starting from your strengths – instead of weaknesses. Thus the coach will help you build the good in your life, taking your life from average to great. And that is why I love PPC so much!
The phases in a PPC process look something like this:
- Phase 1 – Creating the Relationship
- Phase 2 – Strengths profiling
- Phase 3 – Developing an ideal vision (Best Possible Self)
- Phase 4 – Goal setting and execution
- Phase 5 – Concluding the relationship (and re-contracting)
Between phase 2 and 5, the client implements in their day-to-day life a series of activities based on the evidence gathered so far. All this time, the coach tracks the client’s actions and performs a continuos evaluation of the progress.
Now, if you have always been interested in self-development and would like to feel more accomplished with yourself and your life in general, you can book a free session and I will be more than happy to guide you on your journey toward becoming a happier and more mindful person.
There is so much we can talk about this subject. But I do hope that I managed to give you an insight into the coaching process and if you have questions, please let me know.
Until next time, have a lovely summer, lovely people!